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Jillian Needs to Sit Down, Lizzo Can Stand Proud

I’m sure Lizzo is still standing and isn’t going anywhere, and I know she doesn’t need anyone to tell her to stand tall, but I needed to say it. This isn’t a topic that I weigh in on easily (yes, pun intended). I am overweight and have been most of my life. I adore Lizzo, because she has confidence that I have never had. I wish I could love my body the way that it is, but I tend to fall on the side of what Jillian Michaels has said. My body is unhealthy, therefore I should not glorify it. The problem is, Jillian is wrong.

If you are not overweight, you cannot know what our day to day experience is like. There are enough people, particularly in the US, telling overweight people that we are not beautiful and that we are not worthy. Yes heart disease and diabetes and the risks of other illnesses are a problem, but not feeling beautiful is never going to help that get any better. It also should be said that people can be thin and still get heart disease and diabetes, I’m pretty sure Bob Harper can speak to that. 

 The other thing is, Jillian wasn’t just speaking against Lizzo‘s body, but she was speaking out of turn, and disrespecting Lizzo‘s black culture. In black Culture full-figured women are respected and appreciated much more than in white culture. When I was studying in Ghana, the men there would always tell me how beautiful I was, and it was disconcerting because I wasn’t used to it. I was used to the unattainable standard, practically anorexic, airbrushed, impossible measurement of a woman’s beauty. I was used to men yelling at me out of cars that I was a “FAT BITCH”.  I was used to people telling me that if I would just lose weight I would be able to get a man. Doesn’t really help, when you’re gay, but that’s another topic, for another day.

The bottom line is that there is an intersectionality that needs to be part of the discussion, because it is a very white American judgment to say that being thin dictates your worth. I have so much praise for Lizzo, because she is showing young girls all over the world, that beauty comes in all sizes. We absolutely need that to be taught to our kids. They must know that size doesn’t dictate your worth.

 My other problem with what Jillian was saying, is that being overweight isn’t always the problem. Sometimes it’s the side effect. I have lupus and fibromyalgia. I used to be over 100 pounds lighter, going to the gym 5 to 6 days a week. Then one day I couldn’t get out of bed. It got worse and worse, and now it’s an inverted climb, instead of just an uphill battle, trying to lose this weight. As I struggled to get any doctor to pay attention, I had to learn the hard way that doctors can be fat phobic too. They will just say you need to lose weight. Well, losing weight isn’t going to make me absorb iron better.  I am so iron deficient, that I have to get iron infusions. I’ve got a list of doctors a mile long, and it took me a long time to get ones who would take my diseases seriously and stop tagging everything as just a weight problem. There is more going on, and because of it, losing the weight isn’t just a simple proposition.

In the meantime, hating my body is not going to get me anywhere. I am a happy person, who will often sing show tunes around my house, while taking to my cats. I have no use for putting myself down constantly, and I would much prefer to see myself in Lizzo’s reflection than Jillian’s. I may have weight to lose, I may decide at some point that I’m happy where I am, even if that’s not as thin as Jillian would like me to be. Regardless I don’t have use for anyone telling me that I shouldn’t see myself as beautiful and that I shouldn’t metaphorically lift myself up and be happy with who I am.

Thank you Lizzo, for all that you do for girls around the world. Thank you for what you do for me. You make me smile and you make me feel empowered. I wish you had been around when I was growing up. Keep being you and keep doing you. Thanks for your expertise in fitness Jillian, but I think I’m all set with your fat shaming.

Ugh Do I Have to Be Nice?

So recently I posted on a local Facebook group, because I was hosting a phone banking event for a candidate I’m supporting in the Democratic primary. Quite quickly there was a laughing reaction to my post, and a comment that said “good luck with that!”. I sensed, despite emotion being lost in social media, that the comment was likely meant sarcastically. I was dumbfounded as to why. I confirmed if it was indeed sarcastic and it was immediately confirmed. I wanted to post redacted print screens, but the admin of the group deleted my post. I’ve messaged them to confirm they did this, but it seems that they did. I so wish they hadn’t.

When I posted the phone banking event, I didn’t expect a bunch of people to sign up, but I also didn’t expect people to be rude about it. I’m on twitter and facebook enough to have dealt with my fair share of trolls and bots, but this is supposed to be a local group.  I follow the same group account on Twitter, and although I will admit I haven’t seen national politics coming from that account or page, I do see stuff about the community. It seems I misjudged the point of the page.  I thought the page on Facebook, and the account on Twitter, was meant to be a way to bring people in the community together. I thought it was a way to help us get to know each other, and maybe enable us to do what we can to make our community as good as it can be. To help us all thrive.

For me, being a member of a community means doing my part, and that includes participating in my democracy. I consider it my civic duty. To me it is the ultimate act of patriotism. The more citizens participate in our democracy, the more our democracy will represent the interests of our community. 

After the other person on the post started posting back, I started writing a knee-jerk response, and then I took a step back.  Not only would I reflect badly on the campaign I’m volunteering for, I wouldn’t make the situation better.  I’m annoyed this is the first response I got.  I would have so preferred no response, to that. Instead, I expressed that I was sorry they felt the need to insult me, and I wished them well.

They then started posting Trump/MAGA stuff and that re-affirmed my decision not to make it worse. It’s not just that the Trump/MAGA crowd is most commonly about racism and claiming everyone is out to get them and their way of life. It’s also that there was no need to go down that petty of a path. How does any of that build up our community or bring us closer together? I was trying to bring us closer together. I was not forcing my candidate on anyone. I was posting for those interested. Those not interested could have just ignored the post. I would have welcomed a respectful debate on any issue we might disagree on, but that wasn’t on the table here.

I didn’t share one of my political blog posts, or a meme. I posted a local event that I thought other people in my local community might be interested in. I wasn’t selling anything. I was volunteering my time, and inviting others to join. 

Being a liberal Democratic voter, I am used to getting called a snowflake, a smash-up between liberal and the R word (I don’t get how this makes anyone a better person, smashing up the R word with anything), and I get labeled with some sort of allegiance to a “deep state”/do-nothing Democratic Party.  Ironically, a “Do-Nothing” Congress has a specific meaning that most aren’t aware of (The ‘do-nothing Congress’ graduates to the ‘do-nothing-much Congress’: 12/20/2016) It’s not all of Congress, in the current session, and voters need to check that. Right now, the Senate is the problem, thanks to Mitch McConnell and every Senator not standing up to his corruption.

When it comes to volunteering for a campaign, or spending time paying attention to politics, our representatives, campaigns for office, and our elections, I just think this country needs to really consider our individual responsibility. I believe we get what we put into our democracy.  If we want our government to work better, we might just have to do some work ourselves.

Right now is the primary season for the Presidential elections.  If you are registered with a political party, this is your chance to have a say in who will run for President in your party. This is it. You can support candidates who you believe will represent your community for the better. 

I believe that sitting on the sidelines, painting all politicians and elected officials as bad people, is lazy. Our democracy takes more work than to moan and complain, from the cheap seats. It requires that we are part of it. We are meant to be an informed member of the electorate. We are meant to pay attention to how our representatives are representing us. We are supposed to call them and contact them and tell them how we want them to vote. We are supposed to challenge them. We are supposed to show up to town halls, and if they don’t hold town halls insist that they do. We should write, call, email, and get on social media. If we are up to it, we should run for office.

I will absolutely vote for the Democratic nominee, but more than that I will volunteer for them, I will campaign for them, and I will not sit on the sidelines, because our democracy demands that we all work for it. It’s up to us to make it as good as it can be, and the more that we participate, the more that we are involved, the more our democracy can deliver for us all. 

I believe it is a privilege that I have, this freedom to elect representatives who are bound to serve my interest. I believe it is my civic duty to make sure they do, and if they don’t, it’s my responsibility to call them out, and support a challenger if they don’t do right by my community. I cherish this right, this privilege, and this opportunity, to have a say in how my government works. I wish more would join me.

“Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.”
—George Jean Nathan

Today and Tomorrow

Today the House impeached President Trump. During the debate, the Republicans failed their oaths, as they tried to distract from the proceedings. They stomped their feet, and refused to acknowledge that Trump asked for a favor in return for Congressionally approved aid. They made him out to be a martyr, suggesting he has been treated worse that Jesus. For some reason, that won’t offend Christians.  They don’t seem to care that Trump attempted to use our tax dollars, so to leverage dirt on a political opponent, because he wanted to rig the election in his favor. That is not respecting the will of the people, or his duty as a public servant.

Republicans claimed that Democratic voters and Congressional reps have wanted Trump gone since the beginning of his administration. They aren’t wrong, but why does that matter? I have wanted him gone for his refusal to be transparent and accountable to the people. Where are his tax returns? The people have a right to know what the President is hiding in them. President Carter had to sell his peanut farm, but Trump, who was just recently reported to have 2 sets of books for just one of his properties, and no one in the GOP seems at all concerned about the need for him to be transparent to the people.

He tears babies from their parent’s arms and locks them in cages, to be neglected and guarded by armed white supremacists, who don’t even have to pass background checks. The kids’ records aren’t kept and kids are being sold to private adoption agencies, while the parents are coerced into signing deportation papers they can’t read.

He is repealing environmental regulations meant to protect our planet, our breathable air, and our drinkable water.

He manufactured a trade war with China, so that he could have a reason to trigger a farm bailout, which didn’t help small family farms at all. Instead it went to corporate farms who donate to his campaign and GOP campaigns. Meanwhile massive numbers of smaller farms are ending in bankruptcy.  Just one in a number of kleptocratic grifts Trump is openly commmitting from the White House.

He is working tirelessly, not for the people, but in an effort to dismantle our health care so that only the wealthy can afford to get any care. This is one the GOP isn’t just ignoring, but are 100% on board with. They don’t want the government to ensure health care for every citizen. They want it privatized, because that ensures their campaign coffers stay fat.

Despite all of this, none of it has anything to do with why Trump was impeached today. He abused the power entrusted to him, by the people. When he took the oath of office, there isn’t any part of me that believes he understood what the oath meant, or cared about its meaning.

The thing is, ignorance is not an excuse. Whether he knows or cares, he chose to take a job that comes with requirements. He is not a king. He works for the people, and he swore an oath to uphold the constitution. So did Republicans in Congress. Attempting to extort a foreign leader, in an effort to find dirt on a political opponent and swing an election in his favor, is a high crime. It has to be. There is no basis for debating the merit. The transcript clearly shows that he attempted to bribe a leader with our tax dollars, for his own self-interest, in an effort to subvert the will of the people.

Republicans complained that he isn’t being given any chance to defend himself. This is an abject lie. The White House has received multiple requests for documents and for witnesses to testify. Trump and the White House have refused this opportunity to participate in the process, which no other White House has ever done. This obstruction flies in the face of Congressional oversight, and the checks and balances of our government. It is also not what any innocent person would do. It is not what someone who respects our constitution and laws would do.

When this is all over we will see whether the GOP in the Senate, led by Mitch McConnell, will allow a fair trial or whether they too will obstruct justice in order to cover for Trump’s crimes. We the people must demand that our Senators call witnesses, including acting Chief of Staff Mick Mulvaney, who said from the press briefing room that the President attempted a quid pro quo and that this happens all the time. He said we should get over it. I never will.

We must demand that the GOP not make a sham of this impeachment, simply because it hurts their political advantage. The constitution and our democracy demands they put the country ahead of their greed and desire for political power. We the people must also be ready to work in 2020. We have a big year ahead, and not just because of the Presidential election. If we do not unseat McConnell, he will keep stalling hundreds of House bills meant to help people, and he will just keep stacking the courts with wholly unqualified lifetime appointments. The GOP will keep trying to suppress voters and we must fight that with voter registrations and grassroots efforts to get out the vote. We must win in big margins, because we know Russia is hacking voting machines, and McConnell refuses to pass the election security bill on his desk. We need to be willing to vote, get friends to vote, and volunteer on campaigns to get the vote out in record high numbers.

Our democracy requires that we the people get more involved. A representative democracy only works if we speak up about how we want to be represented. We need to be diligent and stay informed. We need to vet information, before sharing it online. We need to be ready to vote in our party primaries, so that we voice our say in who the nominees should be, for all offices on the ballot. We have to get past purity tests and compare the candidates on the ballot to ensure we make our votes count.  We have to convince people on the fence what the math comes down to. Democrats are generally registered in higher numbers, but Republicans vote in higher numbers.  This creates a lot of razor thin majorities. We need to be willing to have those conversations with our 3rd party friends, about the statistical reality. Voting for a Republican will mean the Republican wins. Voting 3rd party, will ensure the Republican wins. Not voting, helps the Republican win.  The only way we ensure the Republicans don’t win, is if we vote Democrat in high enough numbers, that we sweep the math.

We also need to help people understand the reality of which way the wind is actually blowing in this country. That starts with making sure maps show the populations that vote, instead of the land, which doesn’t vote.

This is a good way to show the reality:
Land Doesn’t Vote, People Do: This Electoral Map Tells the Real Story

Wired also covered this well:
Is the US Leaning Red or Blue? It All Depends on Your Map

I’m a fan of pointilism maps.  I feel they really show the political reality of our people very well.

All in all, we need to be in this for the long haul. We need to get non-voters engaged and we need to get citizens to keep voting in all elections. We should have 90% + turnout in every election, and until we do, we shouldn’t be surprised at why things are so dysfunctional. We get what we put in to our democracy, and right now we are in the red. It’s time for a serious investment in the health of our democracy. And yes, yes, I know. It’s a republic. It’s honestly a democratic republic, and it only works if we the people are running it.

Today we impeached. Tomorrow we move forward with upholding the law, and demanding that our government be accountable and transparent to the people.

By the people and for the people.

A Little Time for a lot of Freedom

There is a local election on Tuesday, November 5th. I’m not hopeful that turnout will be anything impressive, because it never is in local election years. View my post on that here: Who is Going to Fix the Potholes?

Because I follow news and elections closely, I can afford to be lax about looking up info to prepare myself for the election.  I didn’t sit down to do it until this weekend.  I needed to look up my registration, view my ballot, and look up info on the candidates.  This way, I will be an informed member of the electorate.  It sounds fancy, but it just means I won’t go into a voting booth blind.  I will do my research and know who is running, and who I want representing me.

First, I looked up my registration.  It took 4 minutes and 14 seconds.  I went to the Monroe County Board of Elections website.  I did that, because it’s my local county’s Board of Elections. They have my ballot, and they will tally my vote.  That way, I’m getting my information right from the source.

Now I’ve got my polling place and what number districts I’m in, for county legislature, state legislature, Congressional districts. What’s more, they have the option for me to view my ballot.  This lets me see what it will look like, when I vote on Tuesday. It shows me all the races, what candidates are on what party lines, and any propositions on the ballot.

I then grabbed all that info and put it in a spreadsheet.  That looks like this:

I’m not expecting everyone to do this, but if you do, it can help to really consider your options.  The ballot gave me the first 3 columns of info.  It took me about 19 minutes to do it. The reason I did this, is for the 4th column. I wanted to look up each candidate’s website or social media page, so I could learn a bit about their platform.  To do that, I went to the Monroe County Democratic Committee website and the Monroe County Republican Committee website.  They will have links to any candidate that they have endorsed. Any on a 3rd party line, and not endorse by either of those two parties, I googled.

Doing that took me 16 minutes.  So, from start to finish, I spent 40 minutes. That leaves me 20 minutes to look at each candidate’s site for a minute or so and see if they are for me.

Come Tuesday, people will be elected to those offices. If turnout is typical of a local election year, about 30% of registered voters will decide those races.  That means about 15%-20% of the population will show up to decide who represents 100% of us. That’s just not enough.  Elected officials will not have any incentive to work in the people’s interest, if the people aren’t even paying attention.

I don’t expect everyone to make spreadsheets, but we owe it to ourselves to know who wants to represent us. Take the 5 minutes to look up your registration, and grab your ballot.  Then you can look up the candidates, and know who the best choice is.  Abstaining means allowing your last choice to end up in power.

We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Sometimes we must interfere. When human lives are endangered, when human dignity is in jeopardy, national borders and sensitivities become irrelevant. Wherever men and women are persecuted because of their race, religion, or political views, that place must – at that moment – become the center of the universe.
~ Elie Wiesel

As a country, we need to all make sure we don’t take our vote for granted. It is most certainly under attack.

 

Best Eggplant Parmesan is with Tomatoes!

I know, eggplant parmesan has marinara sauce. That’s not what this is about.  I get a 1/2 share of a CSA.  It’s a local co-op of farms, and you sign up to get a weekly box of fruits and veggies (and other stuff, if you choose to purchase those shares). I get a 1/2 share, because I am single and the amount I get from that is more than enough.

Last week, we get eggplant, which is such an awesome one to get in season.  They were on the small side, but I really wanted to make eggplant parmesan. Its a great dish, and I can container it for lunch for the week.  I went on pinterest and found this great recipe.

Best Baked Eggplant Parmesan

I LOVE this recipe for so many reasons.

  1. It uses 1/2 panko and 1/2 traditional breadcrumbs, which creates a great mixture
  2. It calls for fresh mozzarella.  This makes it sooooo much better than bagged shredded
  3. It recommends fresh parmesan
  4. It also calls for fresh basil

Because I worried about having enough eggplant, I had to find a way to “beef” it up.  I realized I had gotten beefsteak tomatoes in the CSA too, and the recipe had instructions for breading and baking the eggplant on a sheet in the oven.  It’s really similar to a baked version of a fried green tomato.  Eureka!  I did one sheet full of eggplant, and one sheet of tomatoes.

I also used an oven-roasted marinara that I had made prior, which was also full of CSA veggies.  That recipe is here:

Oven Roasted Marinara

I didn’t have any tomato paste to add, and wished I had, after I tried it over pasta, but when I added it to this dish, it came out glorious. I add a quartered bell pepper and a quartered jalapeño pepper to the veggies I roast. I then add 1-2 cans of tomato paste when I throw everything in the processor.

 

 

I will forever make my eggplant parm this way.

The Newb Perspective

I joined Twitter in 2009, but I didn’t really get it.  I followed a few accounts, mostly friends, and some other accounts I can’t really recall.  In 2015, as the Presidential campaign heated up, I started to get more active.  It turns out there are are few interests that draw people to a live feed platform, like Twitter.  From my observations, twitter is meant to be a public forum, unlike Facebook, which is more where friends and families can connect, and can keep their circle closed if they want. Twitter is great for live-tweeting events (and tv shows) , and for engaging in news of the moment.

My interests on Twitter are mostly politics, activism, and news.  I also love all the kitties and following actors I like, but when it comes to politics, Twitter is great. It at least has the potential to be great.  I can follow my reps. I can follow excellent journalists covering elected officials, and I can engage with them using tools like resistbot.  In college, a senior student came to speak to one of my poli sci classes.  He said something to the effect of “This 4 years here, will be what you make of them.”  It seems the same goes for most social media platforms.

Many complain that Twitter is a cesspool, because of all the trolls, and hate that can infiltrate conversations. They aren’t wrong, and that is a problem.  It gets made worse, because foreign interests are paying for bot accounts to pop up and fuel discord and online fighting.  How can one avoid it?  I imagine it would be pretty difficult. I often get caught up in fighting with someone, before realizing I should just block them.  But that is only one part of the problem.  The entire concept of the platform is geared for people to seek having high follower accounts, lots of retweets and likes, and to get the elusive blue check mark. That’s the golden ticket to being legit on this site. All others might be bots, trolls, an account that was bought and sold, or some pathetic loser like me, who just wants to be part of the conversation.

Following a number of well-respected and verified accounts, there are often a lot of tweets reprimanding people for bad twitter etiquette. Most commonly, this is tagging someone in a reply or retweet, that the original tweeter did not tag.  I have to agree, it’s a crappy thing to do.  You open up that person to attacks that they did not sign up for. It was their decision to tag someone or not. To overrule their decision is certainly something another tweeter can do, but it’s also a bad move.  This contributes to the cesspool environment.

I have learned a lot in the last 3 years, as I have become increasingly active on Twitter.  My follower account is in no way impressive, though I feel I make up for it with the massive amount of accounts I follow. I’m a liberal Democrat, and I see a lot of people posting with a hashtag of #FBR which is for the follow back resistance.  I don’t really get this. It seems like a disingenuous way to up your follower account. People can certainly pay to promote tweets, which is most certainly disingenuous, although I would understand if it was for a political campaign or for someone selling products or services.

What baffles me, is the way some people use the platform, in what seems like a manner that doesn’t align with the values they profess.  People will like tweets from people they don’t support, and I don’t understand that.  They will retweet a post from someone hateful, which they are mostly doing to say, “Hey look. This awful person said this awful thing.” but they don’t add any context or refute the original tweet in any way.  What purpose does that serve, other than to spread the hate or misinformation? It elevates it with your account.

I consider myself a newb on the platform because I don’t use any analytical tools, or promote my tweets, and I don’t have that pretty blue check mark.  I tweet and follow people/accounts I like hearing from.  I refuse to follow people who I don’t support or like.  I will never follow Trump. I blocked him a while ago, because I think Twitter has a bad exception to their policy, by saying they will suspend and ban accounts that spread hate, but they won’t apply that standard to a world leader.  Does that mean if Hitler or Stalin were alive today, they would let them spread their hate, free from consequence?

It seems to me that we, the users of the platform, have the power and responsibility to use this tool in a way that will ensure it is one that promotes the good and bans the bad, whether the company’s admins are consistent or not. These are my self-imposed guidelines for being a good tweeter:

  1. Don’t tag someone in a reply or retweet, if they weren’t tagged in the original tweet. If you want to tag that person, write your own tweet. If they were sharing an article, bring up the article, grab the link and make your own tweet. The exception to tagging someone not tagged in an original tweet, is if the account is not a person, like a media outlet such as The Washington Post.
  2. Don’t follow people you don’t support. You up their follower account, and legitimize them. The exception is for journalists who have to follow people to report on them. I feel for them. This also applies to elected officials, who may need to follow other representatives they don’t disagree with. If it’s for your job, that makes sense. Otherwise, I don’t get doing that, as it elevates that person.
  3. Don’t like tweets that you actually do not like. It offers no context and gives the illusion that what was said is popular.
  4. If retweeting something bad, the retweet should contain context, correction of any lies/inaccuracies, or refuting what was said. Only retweet tweets without saying anything, if what was said stands as is. If someone said something and said it well, don’t feel the need to say more on top of it. Retweet it and elevate that voice.
  5. In line with 3 and 4, think of retweeting and likes as endorsements and recommendations. If you don’t agree with the original tweet, say so, or don’t like/retweet it.
  6. Make sure to tweet your own tweets, so that your entire timeline isn’t just retweets and likes. It’s important to make sure your twitter timeline has your own voice, as much as a feed that shares and elevates the voices of those you admire and agree with.
  7. Be respectful. This should be number 1, but I didn’t really go in order.  It can be hard, when firing off your passionate response to something, but keep in mind that there is a human being (generally) on the other end. I am not always good at this, but I always try. Don’t put something online, that you wouldn’t really say to someone’s face. If your argument is that you would be rude to someone’s face, I wouldn’t brag about that.
  8. Give credit where credit is due.  I’ve seen that there are accounts out there, who steal tweets from other people.  Not cool. When you find out someone you follow is stealing someone else’s words, un-follow them, and follow the original tweeter. It’s not easy being original and coming up with good content. Don’t reward accounts that steal from others.
  9. Report, report, report.  When an account is threatening or harassing someone you follow, report them and block them. It helps Twitter to weed out the bad actors.  I would say that 99% of the tweets I report come back as an account that Twitter found violated their policies. The trick is identifying what the account is doing wrong, so that you pick the right reporting option. Is it just offensive? We can’t really expect Twitter to respond to every person being offended. Are they harassing someone? Are they threatening someone? I consider that the most important to report. Are they spreading hate toward a group of people? Get that content off the site, by reporting it. Then block them, so they won’t end up in your world again.
  10. Verify if you aren’t sure. If someone tweets something, but they don’t have a source, take a minute to look it up. If you have to, bookmark the tweet, so you can go verify it later, before sharing it.  I know, how annoying. We want everything to be easy and convenient, but if we want quality, we may have to sacrifice some of the quantity. Take the time to do some searching and find a source that either proves or disproves what is being said. If it will help, include the source you find, in your retweet or reply. Make it your standard that you demand receipts be part of the conversation.

These aren’t exactly visionary guidelines, but I think if everyone followed them, we could make the platform better than it is.  Those spreading hate and being hateful, would have less visibility, and those creating good content, would be seen.

If everyone follows good guidelines we can, as a mass user base, affect how the platform works and is used.  It takes some self control and discipline, but it gets easier and easier, once you employ the standards that will make it a better place to be.

That’s at least what this newb thinks.

Such a Shame to Miss the First Man

It’s a shame that people missed First Man, because they were too busy being pissed about wanting bragging rights as the country that landed on the moon first.  This movie wasn’t about who got there first. Landing on the moon wasn’t kids racing in a school yard. It was so much bigger than that.  It was about humanity, at it’s core. It was about the man, not just the mission.  The movie was personal, and told the story of a man and a mission.  America did land on the moon first, but space exploration is something that has been accomplished by our world and our species. America accomplished that extraordinary feat in the name of our world.
Somewhere along the way, we were entrusted with being the leader of the free world. It wasn’t because that’s what we were. It’s because that was our promise to become.  We were to be a country of immigrants, and slaves who would be freed, and asylum seekers, and refugees, and native born people. We would show how a country of countries would be the example of a free and fair nation. We would be the standard, for the world, as to how people can have individual and collective sovereignty. Each person would be inherently equal.  Their rights would be unencumbered, insofar as no one person’s will would infringe upon the right of another’s.
This movie, brought us up into the atmosphere where the collective reached new heights, yet also brought us into the heart of family, of life and death, of love and sorrow. It brought to bear, bonds of friendship, community, and a collective bond between people who would seek to accomplish a mission bigger than one person. It would be out of many one. E pluribus unum.
Those who dissed this movie, for not bragging, also miss that this story was not the whole story of our collective country, during this moment in time. This idyllic snapshot did not include all of our people, nor all of our bonds. Just as they judged the movie by it’s preview, they also fail to see beyond the myopic view of what we accomplished. We cannot hope to reach our promise, if we do not see all of our past, as it bears on our current challenges. We will never make good on who we pledged to become, if we do not recognize, that the bonds many of our country’s citizens shared during this golden age of discovery, looked very different. Until we can recognize our collective truth, we cannot realize our overall mission. For us to achieve the next big leap for mankind, we must first see all of human kind. It is the bridge we must cross.  We must see each other, and all must be seen.
The paradox of this story, is the notion of what one person is and can be, as well as what people can accomplish in a collective bond. Too many of our country is still busy judging that some people should not form a collective bond, and it is antithetical to our nature as a species. The reasons are never more than superficial. Almost always, they are the color of our skin, skewed and distorted views of another’s beliefs, and they completely miss the point. The bond people can make, has the power and the energy and the fuel to create something more than any single people will ever achieve. The more we can bond together, in commonality and purpose, the more we can be as a whole.

Poll This

We need to get polls out of politics.

Watching the 1st Democratic debates last night, NBC had to take commercial breaks, and during some of them, an analyst was discussing polls during the 2016 election, and where these primary candidates are now, and what the polls need to look like for them to win.  It’s such a horrible time suck, that they were spending these precious minutes going over popularity as the most important factor of their candidacy, right in the middle of this debate, which I felt was full of so much substance.

Many people discussed the winners and losers of the first night, and I came away with such a different take.  Yes, Julian Castro got to show how excellent of a candidate he is, and how the press has completely ignored this heavy weight.  The rest of the candidates each had their highs and lows, but I only mean that in that it was a big stage and it was a big challenge to walk away from that 2 hours of debating back and forth with the most memorable sound bites and wording of their promises to lead.

But in point of fact, Julian Castro has been largely ignored in the polls. On the debate stage, we all got to hear how he communicated his ideas, his experience, and his intelligence.  Not everyone can do that.  Many brilliant people are horrible communicators.  Many people, who lack intelligence and morals, are somehow effective at selling what they want people to buy.

But now, talking heads are back to polling.  The candidates will do it to. They have to. If they didn’t do polling and pay attention to polls, they would be walking a tight rope, without looking.  I just envision an election cycle, where there is no polling.  I detest polling.

It’s not just that they generally only pull likely voters. It’s that we’re supposed to care who is leading in popularity, which is not always the best indication of who it has the best ideas, or who will be most effective at implementing their vision. Someone may be a lofty orator, and be capable of energizing a crowd, with an impassioned speech. That doesn’t mean they can get bipartisan support, or effectively pass the legislation that will put their plans into effect. If people were left just evaluating the qualities, their rhetoric, their resume of service, and they’re voting record if there is any, we might end up with better public servants. We shouldn’t treat our civic process like a popularity contest.

It is the way we make the process of our democracy, where we elect public servants, a game of politics and who is trending.  That’s what’s infested our government and it has caused rot in our institutions. It’s allowed disingenuous people rise to the top of a crowd, when they would be at the bottom, based on merit.

In suggesting that politics should have a place in the process of public service, is to suggest that we should make sport out of representing the people and living up to the promise we have yet to fulfill, as the leader of the free world.

Our promise is that every country can and should be one that guarantees the inherent right to be free. It’s also an ideal that we can achieve common ground from different backgrounds and peoples, based largely on the principle that we would be a living proof of this, as a country of citizens from all over the world. We are a country of countries. We were born that way.

Only those descended from Native Americans are natural born of this land. The rest of us came to be here, through a lineage that either willingly came here, fled oppression or violence, or in the case of People of Color, were imprisoned and enslaved, having been forced to immigrate to this land. Today, we are made up largely of immigrants and descendants of immigrants or survivors of human trafficking and slavery.

When it comes to public service in our democracy, debate is vital to the health of our democracy. We just saw that with the first Democratic debate, last night. It is possible for people to stand on the stage, and have different ideas on how to lead our country towards that promise.

They did this while showing respect for their fellow candidates, showing respect for all citizens, and showing respect for the institutions they are running to serve in and lead.

We also saw that candidates can agree, and that’s not something we typically see in political campaigns. It shouldn’t be considered bad strategy, to find consensus with each other, because you’re having to play politics. The more we can agree on solutions together, the more we can actually get done. That’s the end goal that we’ve gone away from, because in the world of politics, it’s about who’s idea it was, and who gets credit for it, and if you agree, then maybe you are just a follower and not a leader. It’s a false and damaging notion that takes us away from our greater mission. That is one of government service, public representation, and delivering on the right to a government that is truly by the people and for the people. It’s not meant to be by one person and only for the wealthy few. It’s not meant to be for one race, one religion, or one orientation.

Imagine if we had a campaign for public office, and an election cycle, with out polling. I know it doesn’t seem realistic to suggest such an idea. I’m certain polling exerts would enjoy ripping me a new one. Let’s just keep in mind that this notion of campaigns being a debate on the ideas, and not politics, that’s what our lauded founding fathers intended us to do.

It just seems that polling is so fickle and shallow. It’s about who’s trending or popular, but we don’t know why they are receiving support. It’s not black and white in any way, but completely gray and muddy. There is no one definitive reason a person’s poll numbers might go up. It could be because of something they said. It could be because of an allegation that is floated, which might later be dispelled. It literally could be because someone farted in public. Talk about which way the wind blows.

The problem is that once a poll is released, it now tends to push the next poll. Now we have polls pushing polls. But after that, now the public starts to see someone’s got the race in the bag, and that either depresses turn out because everybody is sure that person will win, or it just builds their momentum because now they’re the popular person so let’s jump on the bandwagon.

Maybe if we didn’t focus on this arbitrary and meaningless number, we might be able to focus on who is more authentic, has the facts, comes with the receipts, has the resume of public service and advocacy, conveys the depths of their experience, and whatever else you think should be factored in. I personally believe morals and ethics are tantamount.

That’s something you have to watch out for over time, by seeing how they vote which is why I think that when people run for office they shouldn’t start at the top. They should start local and work their way up. I value experience, and I also value seeing the proof in the pudding. I can’t tell you how many posts I’ve seen of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in a committee hearing, and the byline of the video will say that she brought the receipts.

It’s the perfect metaphor because she is proving in her questioning that she’s prepared. She came to do the job, she’s fighting for the people, she’s using facts and reason to question these people on our behalf, and she’s proving why her district was right to elect her. She’s not taking PAC money. She’s not dealing in back rooms with lobbyists. She’s serving in a local restaurant, to bring attention to the unlivable wages of wait staff. She is engaging in government and grassroots activism. She is really in it for the people. We have a lot of these true, sincere public representatives in our Democratic Party. In Congress, at state levels, and I can at least say where I live, at the local level.

I just voted in our local primary, and the candidate I was supporting didn’t win. He would’ve been a real representative for our community. Instead we got the former TV personality, who I do not believe is in it for us. We shall see. You better believe I’ll be keeping my eye on her, and she better represent us well, or she’ll be gone in the next election.

As citizens, we generally have disdain for politics. Our voter turnout is abysmally low. I consider it the shame of this country that our citizens brag about being so patriotic, but in a local election year less than 30% of registered voters turn out to the polls.

I challenge every city in this country to organize and turnout the vote and show up for this year’s local election. Don’t just wait for 2020. We got a bump in 2018, but that doesn’t mean we are done. Voting and democracy is not a one time act. It must be maintained, and we must be diligent. We must demand transparency, and we must demand that our government is by the people and for the people, the way it is supposed to be.

We have a long way to go to get there. The only other option is that those in power stay in power, and refused to leave. Once it gets to that, we won’t be able to take it back. We need to have a government that is transparent, is accountable, and shows all the receipts. I want to see the facts, the math, science, and I want to have real debate on the moral imperative of our government to ensure our freedom and to serve us all equally.

We come together and pool our tax dollars for a common wealth, and people represent us in a commonwealth of ideas. Let’s not go broke, when we have every potential within us to fill the bank.

Someone Get Me a Damn Map to Mordor

Considering the last post, and now with this one, I might have to rename this blog image ranted.  Yep. This is another rant.

This time it’s about some health care issues I’ve had to tangle with in the last week.  What I am about to lay out isn’t even centered around my physical or mental health issues. It’s entirely because the health care industry, in the United States, is structured against people.  I don’t want to call us patients, because if things worked differently, so many of us wouldn’t be considered active patients.

I have to preface, that I was diagnosed with lupus about 10 years ago, and with fibromyalgia about 7 years ago. I have spent years hitting the high deductible on my insurance, just to keep a status quo. I have been on gabapentin (neurotin), which is a nerve blocker. I was up to 1,500mg a day at the height of my prescription. I have also been on cyclobenzaprine (flexeril), which is a muscle relaxer. Since I was diagnosed, I have been searching and looking for anything that can help me address the pain, so I can get off these pills.  

This year, I made a decision that instead of hitting my deductible, on maintaining this shitty status quo, I would invest in different therapies and methods to attempt to address my chronic pain and fatigue in more natural ways.  I started by going to an upper cervical chiropractor. A friend contacted me on facebook, telling me that one had drastically helped her with pain issues.  I researched the science behind it, and decided to give it a try.  Most ucc’s don’t take insurance because they are such a niche practice and fighting with insurance companies is too costly for them.  I tried to submit a bill, on their recommendation that my insurance might still accept it. I found out that I have an out-of-network deductible, which is independent of my in-network deductible, and it is slightly more. This means I would need to submit expense receipts for that amount, and have them denied, before they might kick something in. I’ve spent $1,300 on this so far.

I started stepping down to gabapentin.  I had previously pulled back from the 1,500mg to 900mg, because it was making me dizzy all the time.  I am now down to 300mg.  I have a massive stash waiting to go to a drug drop off, because they gave me so many. Yes I have more pain, more of the day, but I was in pain no matter what.  I want off these meds.

I also wanted to find a nutritionist. I went to my insurance website, to look up my plan and see if a nutritionist was covered under my plan. It seemed they were, but only for certain things.  I called my insurance and asked them if I could get a pre-estimate. They said no. They said I would need to go to a nutritionist, incur a bill, and then they would see based on the code the nutritionist put in.  I asked which code was covered. Shockingly, they wouldn’t tell me. (yes, that’s sarcasm)

I finally decided to throw the dice and go.  In our first session, she told me I was going to be covered. Apparently, she came prepared and knew the answer.  I liked her already! I would be covered for one, 1 hour visit, once a month for a year. Opioids, they hand out like candy. Nutritionists are what they are stingy on.  Don’t want us too healthy!  This would still be an out of pocket cost, but at the price negotiated by my insurance.

My new nutritionist had gone over my forwarded medical records and found my doctors neglected to order 9 different blood tests that she thought might either rule out or explain some of my issues. She said she would request that my primary doctor submit the order for those tests, and that I should get a pre-estimate, so I know how much they will cost.  We discussed some other things, and planned to reconvene in a month, hopefully after I’ve taken these tests.  

Tuesday morning, I saw in my online medical chart, that the tests had been ordered. I copied out all the names of the tests, and signed into my health insurance website.  I started a chat and asked if they could help me identify an estimate of the cost.  The customer service rep informed me that they could look up a range of the costs, but that it would depend on where I went. I responded that I would appreciate any info they could give.  In the end, they were able to give me a range for 5 of the 9.  They also gave me a link to Fair Health Consumer, a website where I could look up this stuff, and hopefully get some information. 

They also recommended that I contact the lab, so I did that next.  I called the specific lab, within the network of labs that I could go to. The person I spoke with said they couldn’t help me with costs, but gave me 3 different numbers that were the lab network’s billing or billing type departments. I called the first one, and they gave me another number, but also offered to transfer me to them. They informed me that I needed to give them the 5 digit billing codes.

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Do I look like someone who works for your labs? What 5 digit codes? They said I needed to contact my doctor or… my health insurance.  Awesome.  I then message my doctor. “Thanks for ordering the tests. Can you please give me the 5 digit codes? I need them so I can get a pre-estimate for the cost, so that I can budget the expense.”  I always get a response from the Doctor, himself.  Understandably, a nurse or support staff responded.  She told me that I should ask my nutritionist.

I’m getting a little done now. I’ve spent way too long on something that should have been provided without me even asking. I told my boss about all of this, and he likened it to grocery shopping. It’s not like you go through the store, fill up your cart, and then find out the cost when you ring out. You know going in, what the cost will be. It’s actually law, that they have to have the cost listed. This prevents them from charging one person a different price, than another person. Fair pricing. What a novel idea.

Nevertheless, I message my nutritionist, even though I’m guessing she won’t know them.  As I predict, she responds that she doesn’t have any access, and the doctor’s office certainly should.  The nutritionist couldn’t even order the tests. My doctor had to. So I respond back to the nurse or support staff and convey that I confirmed my nutritionist can not help. I mention that since the doctor can order the tests, I would hope they would know what codes they are, and to please help me identify them.

I have not heard back.

I then check out that aforementioned website.  It looks like this site has codes!!!! I start looking up each test.  Problem is some of the don’t match the exact name. They are these super sciency names. If you can’t tell by now, my heart is liberal arts. I love and respect science, but it’s like speaking another language.  I had no way to know which code was the right one, for multiple of the tests. I guess I’m waiting.

This morning, I decided to call my doctor’s office and see if I might get somewhere talking to someone, instead of waiting to see if I would get a response to my 2nd request for the codes. They informed me that this isn’t something they are familiar with either.  They were researching, but said there was another number I could call.  It was one of the extra numbers I was given yesterday, but had been told it was just another lab network billing number.  The person I spoke with, at my doctor’s office, explained that this number was a mailbox. No one would answer the phone. You leave a message with what you want a cost estimate for, and they apparently call you back.

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Yeah, I’m back there again.  You’re telling me, I call this number, leave a long ass message with my name, my phone number, and a list of all 9 tests (at least 1 of which I don’t know how to pronounce) and someone will magically call me with all my info, in some indeterminate amount of time? Seriously?  You sure I don’t need to write a wish on a piece of paper, leave it under a rock, sacrifice a chicken under a full moon, and wait for my cat to tell me the codes, so I can get the keys to the kingdom?

I proceed to google the phone number, because this seemed ridiculous. I end up finding a website explaining that you can call that number or send an email.  I opt to send the email, so I don’t have to wonder if my voice mail was audible or garbled or whatever.  I could copy the exact names of the tests into the email.  I sent that off this morning.

And now I wait.

Let’s be clear. My new nutritionist requested those tests last Friday. It’s now the end of the day on Wednesday, and I still can’t get the codes or a price estimate for these 9 tests. My real frustration is that this system is fighting me. It’s not just against me, or for those profiting off it. They are fighting to keep in the dark, even on being able to budget these expenses.

I have been fighting for my quality of life, and for my health, for a long time.  I am overweight and I have a lot to work on, but that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve quality care. I also should be able to budget for this cost. I shouldn’t have to fight to be able to budget the massively expensive health care, that I’m paying for, out of pocket.

Some might wonder why I’m going through all of this, instead of just going. I need the tests, so “it is what it is”, right?  Yes and no.  Lupus and fibromyalgia comes with an onslaught of symptoms that can come and go. That means seeing different doctors for different reasons.  Years ago, I was having issues where my legs felt like something was biting them or shocking them, particularly late at night when I was trying to sleep. I called my Rheumatologist, and saw the Nurse practitioner.  She wanted me to see a Neurologist.  I already had one.

Once there, they wanted to order some blood tests and do a series of shock tests.  I got the blood tests done, and then went for the shock tests.  When I finished the tests, they told me at check out that the bill for the shock tests (not including the blood tests) would be $1,600. I was floored. No one thought to warn me??!?!?! I had to open a care credit card (I loathe them) as I forgot to bring my bags and bags of money with me. As long as I paid it off in the year, I would have 0% interest. If I went 1 day over the term, all the interest (something like 20%) would be tacked on.

I just want to prevent being caught in a situation like that again. Even if I can’t prevent the cost, I’d rather know up front, so I can prepare as much as possible. I don’t know why the health care industry wouldn’t want me to be able to do that. Oh wait. I do. They don’t work for me. They work for their CEOs and investors.

It’s often said that our health care industry is built to serve the providers. It benefits insurance providers, pharmaceutical companies, private hospitals, and certain areas of medical practice (some more than others).  What we don’t explicitly say, is that they are actively working against the people. They make the process a boondoggle, so there is no transparency, and so that we can’t see the whole picture.  They are working against our health and our quality of life. They are also working against our financial health.

Not for nothing, but this isn’t exactly a stress reliever.

I’ll post back when I get some answers.

Update:

I got a response from the email I found on that site, saying the tests would only cost $140, so I am good to go!  Now, was that so hard?

The Small Issue of My Mail Delivery

As the title suggests, this is not an issue of much consequence, relative to big world issues.  It’s just been in the background, the periphery, of my life recently.  I live in the city, in a neighborhood that I love.  I have been here 9 years, and I am grateful I’ve been so fortunate to be able to own this home.  It doesn’t seem like a big deal, but to me it is.  I am a woman who bought a home with no one else. I didn’t have a partner, or help from wealthy parents.  I saved up the down payment, looked at houses, and signed every paper, with the pen my firm gave me, for my 5 work anniversary working for them.

It’s been an unexpected sense of pride, that I bought this house and own it. I pay the mortgage and property taxes.  I do the required maintenance on the gutters, furnace, etc. I try to take care of my lawn and garden (Unfortunately, I do not have my Grandma’s green thumb.). It’s been a labor of love, upgrading this house, making it my own, and budgeting to take care of it, which is not always easy.

Every once in a while, I get mail for the person who lived here before me, who is now deceased.  Once in a great while, I get mail that might be for someone else or a name similar to the previous owner. I generally write on the envelope “deceased” or “does not live here”. It always gets taken away.  At least it used to.  Recently, I wrote on a piece of mail ” Does not live here”.  The next day, I was shocked to see the envelope was left in my mailbox and more writing was added.  It said, “Who Does? Put name/s on box.”

(addressee blocked out for privacy)

I was dumbfounded. I loved my mail carriers. They were always nice, delivered well, and they waved even when they were 1/2 down the block and I was driving by or walking. This guy had to be new.  Who did he think he was, telling me I had to put my name on my house? This is my home! I decide whether my name is plastered on it, for any passersby to see, or not to deface my property.

This pissed me off, but I put it aside. He comes by, before I come home. I see him on my Ring monitor, but I’m working, so that’s not ideal for discussing this with him.  Eventually, I decided I would write him a quick note to express my disappointment and explain that this was inappropriate. This is what the note said:

This is entirely inappropriate. I have owned this home for 9 years. I am not required to advertise my name on my house. I have never had an issue marking incorrect maii in this manner. Please send this back.
Thank you.

 

I put it on top of the envelope, and hope he realizes this is not cool.  I certainly did not expect that he would write an entire note back to me, on the back of the note I left him.

This is that reply: 

Hi, I can see your are confused as to why I asked for your mailbox to be labeled. I’m new to this route and I’m trying to learn the names. When people kick back a letter I simply request the box be labeled so we don’t waste each others time w/ mail thats not yours. I have asked dozens of people and you are the only one pushing back on this. Sorry to offend you.

Now I am just infuriated.  Are you kidding me? I’m confused? I don’t think so. You’ve done this to dozens of people and that’s a good thing? What do I have to do, to put this seemingly nothing of an issue, to rest? I considered filing a complaint with the post office, but I was hesitant. Postal workers have tough jobs and I don’t want to give him a hard time.  In the same respect, I don’t deserve this, and I’m getting frustrated because this is my home. No one should be able to tell me what to put on it.

I even looked up postal regulations.  https://www.mailboss.com/guide-usps-mailbox-regulations. I doesn’t say anything about putting your name, and for the record, the number of my address is on a pillar on my porch, in line with my mailbox, in big numbers. You could make the argument that it’s not on my mailbox, as my mailbox is an old fashioned milk door, on the side of my house. This is not the argument he is making.

Then, I check my mailbox and he f%^king put a label on the top of my mailbox door, with my motherf$%king name on it.  Are you kidding me, right now?

 

(my name blocked out)

This is my house! I 1/2 wanted to report him to the police for defacing my property. How dare he? What does he not get about this being my home, my property, and him being so out of line?

I decided I needed to report this to the USPS.  It’s a bit cumbersome filling out the form for this report, and I couldn’t attach any pictures, to document the situation, which is what made me want to write this completely random post about these unexpected troubles I’m having with my new letter carrier.

This is what I wrote in the box for describing the issue:

I’ve owned my home for 9 years, and always had great letter carriers. Recently I wrote on an envelope that the recipient didn’t live here.  The new carrier wrote on the envelope asking who did live here and that I should label my mailbox. He left the envelope. I wrote a note back that this was unprofessional and I am not required to put my name on my house. This is a privacy concern. He wrote back that he’s new to the route and that I needed to help him by telling him who lived here. Then he stuck a label with my name on my mailbox. I need someone to explain to him that this is unacceptable behavior and to knock it off. I can accept mail for anyone at my home, even if they don’t live here. I am not required to put a sign saying who I take mail for. I am allowed to put a note on mail that is not accepted at my address, to return to sender.  Clearly he does not respect this.

If he defaces my property again, I will file a report with the police. He doesn’t pay my mortgage or property taxes. He has no right to put labels on my mailbox, and it is frustrating that he did not just take the mail and move on.  Please deal with this. I have loved the mail carriers I had before, and they never had trouble with this.  Please re-train this carrier, or take him off my route.

So, now I’m wondering. Should I report this to the police, in case he takes it further? Am I making this more than it is?  I am looking for input.  Part of me feels this is a non-issue, but I removed the label he left, and now I don’t know what he might do next. I’m frustrated, and wondering if I even should be.  I’m hoping I will get some feedback, from anyone who thinks I am right to be upset, and those who think I am not. Should I have left the note, and taken the steps I have taken? Is reporting him to the police necessary?

Thanks for your input.

————-

Update: I got a call from the Station Manager, for the station where my mail goes through. He asked me to describe what had happened. He then said it was completely inappropriate, from the moment the letter carrier wrote on the envelope. He also let me know that this letter carrier is no longer working for the station and is now at another station. I recommended that the new station might want to submit him for some re-training. The manager said it was just completely inappropriate and should never have happened. He also thanked me for reporting it. I thanked him for calling me. 

I really appreciated that they didn’t just email me, but he called and personally addressed my issues.  Postal workers are incredibly busy and I have the highest respect for their work.  My regular carrier is back on my route, and she is fantastic. I hope the new carrier, will learn to respect the right of home owners to decide how their mail is delivered, and how their house is or is not marked. 

Owning a home is a pride I never realized I would feel. I just thought it would be a matter of fact thing.  I quickly saw that the effort of caring for a home, beyond just paying the mortgage, builds a sense of pride in the owner, at least for me.  We have our arguments, me and my personified abode, but overall I am proud that I saved up, and bought this house all on my home. 

I recall that when I was nearing the closing, I was terrified I would somehow end up over my head and lose the house in like 2 years. Having just passed 9 years of home ownership, I feel like I know myself more.  I have figured out solutions, learned to budget, learned what I like and don’t like, and I keep learning.  I love the quirks of my house, including my mailbox, which happens to be an old fashioned milk door.  I look forward to receiving mail, from awesome letter carriers, for years to come.

The end!